Swing dancing has always been one of those things on my list of random things to do to add to my resume ... right alongside kickboxing and learning Icelandic. Sort of a little bag of goodies to bust out to keep things interesting in the future.
"Honey, I didn't know you could [fill in the blank]!"
And I would just give a little look of mischief that conveys ... "There's more to me than you think!"
So when invited to go to a dancing lesson tonight, I jumped at the opportunity ... especially knowing that my friend was as much of a beginner as I was.
As I went from partner to partner, I was asked ... "So, have you done this before?"
"No. Well, unless you count dancing along with a Learn to Swing DVD by myself in the living room ...
Sad ... I know. But you do what you can.
The thing is that I went merely for a good time. I never anticipated that it would be one of the greatest opportunities to observe my theories of male leadership.
The beautiful thing about dancing is that the woman (follower) masters a couple of steps and that's all she has to worry about. The man (leader) has a heavier load to bear ... twist, push, pull, swivel, catch her hand, etc. If the man knows what he wants, is assertive and confident, it makes for one of the most exhilarating experiences a woman has ever experienced. Together, as she follows his gentle leading as he shepherds her across the dance floor, they become one entity.
There were a couple of dancers on the floor that were a thrill to watch ... both were masters of the dance ... but the man was leading ... calling the shots by a mere tug of the hand here ... or a slight twist of the wrist there.
As I went from partner to partner and experienced their different styles of leadership I quickly made mental notes of each man. Two of the fellows were good dancers ... but too ... um ... too much like noodles. One guy didn't know what he wanted which made me feel uncertain of what I was meant to do. But then there were the rare few who made me feel like Ginger Rogers because they knew what they wanted and led me right along with them.
My suggestion: Men, take Swing dance lessons. And no, ... dancing does not lead to sex! (unless you're married and you want to). Women long for the type of leadership from men experienced on the dance floor. If you apply the lessons of the dance to life, it will leave the women longing for you to ask them to dance again.