Tuesday, April 10, 2007

dear God, please tell him he's wrong so i don't have to

Miss Halfway is a new blogger from Argentina. I love her deep questions about life. This is her latest post (click here). Below is my response.

i think you and i are a bit alike in this. i will often keep from telling someone that they have hurt me or disappointed me ... perhaps it's because, like you, i hate to bring them grief ... or maybe i avoid confrontation at all cost ... or maybe it's my pride.

but in the past year i have not confronted people for another reason. whenever i am hurt or disappointed, instead of focusing on the wrong that has been done to me, i have learned to pray.

eh .. this isn't some sort of "Dear God, please help me not to be angry and please forgive him" prayer.

it's much more than that.

i am afraid of my anger. afraid of its ugliness. it is only with God's help that i can turn my eyes away from my anger at another person and look at my own filthiness. no, it's not that i am self-depricating ... it's more being realistic. how dare I judge someone when I myself have done more than my share of wrong!

it is only when I am fully aware of my own wrongdoing and have, through God's help, changed that I can help others see their wrong and change, as well. otherwise, I fear my reaction to my hurt may do just as much hurt (or more) than was done to me.

the answer is DEFINITELY not to think that all you need is more self-confidence. we all know that the self-esteem movement has done little but create a generation of self-righteous egomaniacs.

no. i think humility is the answer here.

ha ha ... talk about remembering sunday school ... remember this?

Matthew 7:1-5

i like your grandmother.


Kelli B said...

i find this post inspiring. you inspire me, christine.

thanks for being so real and honest and sharing your heart - it challenges and inspires me.

CraigS said...

Especially in marriage, and especially for women, it is important to tell your partner when they have hurt or disappointed you.

Of course you must discern whether your expectations were right or not. But if they were, then you need to speak up.

Keeping stuff like that inside is a marriage killer...